


Using the Moment

by gala_apples



Category: Bandom, Cobra Starship
Genre: Break Up, M/M, Rebound Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-03
Updated: 2012-10-03
Packaged: 2017-11-15 13:15:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/527713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gala_apples/pseuds/gala_apples
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Alex gets dumped, things get awkward very quickly for Ryland.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Using the Moment

A week later and everyone’s still not talking about it. It’s downright eerie. Gabe and Vicky are not the type of people to keep their mouths shut in any situation where ridiculing is possible. Most people are very careful to watch what they say and do in fear that it may be used against them in a court of lol. And it’s not like Ryland hadn’t known that. In fact he had never hit on Alex precisely because either Gabe or Vicky was bound to find out and then everyone on tour would know. Well, that and the fact that Alex was straight, and in a committed relationship.

Like always, there was a party on the Academy bus, and like always, Gabe and Vicky decided to go. Nate went too, all three of them mocking him and Alex for getting boring in their old age. Ryland ignored it, life was easier when you ignored the mocking of your bandmates. After awhile he went to see if Alex wanted a game of chess. Chess was another thing to avoid around Gabe and Vicky, unless they were playing a drinking version of it. It was sort of remarkable how Vicky had the ability to turn everything ever into a drinking game.

Alex didn’t reply to his call out from across the bus. Which meant one of three things. He might be trying to catch up on sleep, so they could all go out and party tomorrow, he might be jerking off, or he might be listening to something at full blast on his ipod. If he was sleeping Ryland would let him be, if he was getting off he would let him finish. But if he was just listening to music, well, they could put it in a docking station and then Alex could entertain him.

He pulled the curtains to the side to find out it was none of the above. Alex was in his bunk, crying. Fucking crying, and since when did any of them have big emotional breakdowns? And since when did they not tell the rest of the band?

“Megan broke up with me.”

“That’s really shitty.” Oh fuck, why didn’t he go to the party? Ryland didn’t do emotional shit. Cobra in general didn’t do emotional shit. What he needed to do right now was flee the bus and go track down Pete Wentz. Pete Wentz was all about emotions, his lyrics proved it. Pete would fix Alex, and then they could play cards or something.

“She said there was no point in dating someone that was so far away all the time. When we got back I was going to ask her to move in with me! I tried to tell her and she said it didn’t matter if she was living in my empty apartment.” Ryland didn’t really know what to say. The few relationships he’d been in he was always the one to end it. He didn’t have much patience for people trying to change him. He was pretty sure this was probably a time where a ‘fuck that bitch anyway’ speech would make things worse.

At a loss for what else to do, he shoved at Alex until there was room for both of them on the bunk. He couldn’t provide words of wisdom, and he couldn’t provide numbing -if Alex wanted to get tanked to make it stop hurting he’d be out with the rest of the band- but he could be affectionate. Wasn’t that what people wanted during a break-up? Chocolate and ice cream and puppies and hugs? Or maybe he’d just watched too many women’s network movies at three in the morning. Either way he was already committed to the hug, his long arm splayed over Alex’s chest.

It was silent for a bit, which Ryland was grateful for. He really didn’t want to listen to Alex cry, it felt like he should be saying something comforting, but he had nothing in his repertoire. Alex rolled to the side, burrowing his face in his shoulder. The feel of warm tears soaking his shirt was bad, but better than actually hearing sobbing. It was impossible to tell how long it had been, there wasn’t a clock in the bus and he wouldn’t have been able to see it from his prone position anyway. But it felt like it had been hours, and he really wanted to get up. A mix of sympathy and awkwardness was eating at him. Surely you only had to comfort for a certain amount of time if you were a guy?

About the time that Ryland decided he was going to tell Alex he was going to be alright, and flee for Academy’s bus and watery beer, Alex shifted on the bed. Suddenly he was kissing him. His lips were wet and salty, he tasted like tears. Ryland’d had a long life, it wasn’t the first time he’d had a tearstained kiss, he’d had his share of drunken angry girls bailed on by friends at bars. It was the first time he’d been kissed by a crying boy. It was the first time Alex had kissed him.

He understood the concept of grief-filled fucking. A lot of sex came from sadness or nostalgia or anger; something they never taught in eighth grade sex-ed. The knowledge didn’t make Alex pawing at his zipper any better. He wanted this, but not in the same way Alex did.

“There’s not enough room to do this here,” he said, trying to give Alex an out.

“Fine, let’s go to the kitchen.” His voice was off, not husky and passionate, just clogged from the tears.

Feeling like there was no other possibility, Ryland unfolded from the bunk and moved into the tiny kitchen area. Nothing in a tour bus was spacious, but there was at least enough room for Ryland to rest his elbows on the debris-laden counter. Alex was sweaty pressed against him.

And that’s what Nate, Vicky, and Gabe walked in on. He should have heard the door open. It was only like three feet away from the counter they were using. But he was busy having an epic battle between body, which was rather impressed at the way everything had turned out, and mind, which was severely depressed that Alex didn’t actually want him, he just wanted the memory of Megan to go away for a few minutes.

He did react to Gabe’s mutter of “Oh, okay then.” His head twisted to the side just in time to see the three of them turn around and walk back out. He let Alex keep fucking him, because what was the point in stopping?

But a week later, and there hasn’t been one joke, one dirty comment, one insinuation. It’s driving Ryland insane. Finally he cracks and demands “Why are you not mocking me and Alex?”

“Why would we?”

Ryland stares at Vicky, who’s eating her bagel without any trace of humor. Is she serious? “Uh... because you caught us fucking?”

“We’ve never mocked your relationship before.” Gabe comments around his mouthful of Frosted Flakes.

“We didn’t have a relationship before!”

“A bit late to be lying, don’t you think?”

Seriously, is everyone on crack? Gabe and Vicky haven’t made lewd jokes, and now Gabe thinks he and Alex have been fucking for centuries. He’d like to blame tour mania, but they’ve only been out a few weeks. “Dude, he had a girlfriend.”

“A beard, obviously.” Nate pipes up from the tiny table.

“Look, whatever, we don’t care. Just because we only caught you now doesn’t mean we didn’t know long before. We don’t care. We’re not even gonna say don’t fuck on the bus, ’cause where else are you supposed to? Just clean up your come after you’re done.”

“You can go have a wake and suck now,” Nate offers.

Ryland’s not ready to argue this so he goes to the bunks. Maybe if they provide a united front of ‘we’re not screwing’ they’ll believe it. He categorically does not want any of them to believe he and Alex are together. It’ll hurt each time they reference it, a tease about what he can’t have. And if it leaks it’ll make it harder to get laid with people that are actually interested. 

“You know they think we’re dating? That she was a beard?”

Alex grins, sleep still in his eyes. “You wanna date? I don’t think it’ll be much different from what we already do, besides the sex part. Don’t worry, you won’t be my rebound boy.”

He can’t help but laugh at that. He thinks Alex is full of shit, and that’s exactly what this is, and at the end of the tour he’ll be the one miserable and crying when Alex moves on. But if Pete and Mikey were able to handle it, then so can he. And then he reconsiders Nate’s idea and crawls into the tiny bunk beside Alex. If he’s going to live in the wake of Alex’s breakup, live in the moment, then he needs to use each one to the best of his ability.  



End file.
